And I have my share of secrets

Because the older I get, the more I've come to realise that, one, it's not worth getting upset when people disappoint you because, more often than not, they don't give a hoot that they are letting you down; and, two, it's pointless to depend on others to make you happy.

Far safer and saner for one to be self-sufficient first, and to be the source of one's own happiness.

Maybe I've been disappointed by too many people too often and am seeking comfort in cynicism.

Whatever the case, when I look back, it does seem to be one endless period of seeking approval, striving to be nice and desiring to be loved and liked by the people I loved and liked.

For too long, my happiness and sense of worth were tied to things beyond my control - how I was regarded, whether I was being thought about, whether the phone would ring, whether I was considered worthy enough company for the weekend.

I needed approval, my expectations of others were high, but I was only setting myself up for disappointment. Just because you want someone's life to revolve around yours doesn't necessarily mean that he wants that, too. And even if he does, well, people are busy with their own lives, too. You can't make another person fit your specifications and your demands just so you - and only you - can be happy.

And rather than behave in this unreasonable way, isn't it smarter to be more independent? To not have to depend on others for validation?

The problem is - how does one go about making oneself happy?
For me, the answer must be to be more self-sufficient, and the key to that, I reckon, must be to respect yourself more - to find ways to be at peace with yourself and content with what you are and have.

It is also to do with finding what I call a happy place within yourself where you can retreat to, your own safe haven, if you like.

I'm at tumblr now I love tumblr so bye!

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